What’s up Fear?
Frozen in fear, I was on all fours on the mountain slope, staring nervously at the steep drop on my left. I realized I had two options: either hurl myself off the edge and get it over with or muster every ounce of courage and keep going. (Spoiler: I chose the latter.)
Now, to put this scene in perspective – I was a good 5 feet away from the edge of the cliff. My friend Tanya had already made it easily to the top. And a jaunty fellow was literally running down the same slippery slope that I was stuck on. So, it’s possible that I wasn’t in any actual danger? But, for whatever reason, to me, it felt like life or death. 25 years later, my heart is racing just writing about it.
Fear. Such an interesting thing. Biologically speaking, its purpose is to alert us to danger and promote the "fight or flight " response in our sympathetic nervous system, prepping us to either take on a threat, or get the heck out of there.
But many times, usually due to past experiences, trauma, mis-wiring or firing in the brain, our body perceives a threat of danger when actually, in the here and now, not so much. Our nervous system goes into overdrive, our ability to think clearly takes a nosedive, and fear becomes less helpful and more paralyzing. That’s how we get stuck—unable to push forward and do the things that make life exciting and fulfilling.
After what Tanya and I now refer to as the “terror on the scree” moment, I started digging deeper into fear. I’ve come to see it as information—kind of like a nudge to stop and ask, “What’s really going on here?”
For me, this always starts with the obvious question “Am I in danger?”. Also known as “Where’s the bear?”. If the answer is yes (or right freaking there!), I allow my body to do its thing to survive. Interestingly, I run into very few bears. So I start exploring the deeper stuff, like the core belief that’s driving my reaction—maybe something like, “I’m not good enough,” “I’m unlovable,” “I’m alone,” “I’m not safe.” Once I identify that, I can work through it, set my fear aside, and move forward.
Today I invite you to look what fear is doing in your life. Notice where it pops up and see if you can unpack what’s really holding you back. It’s not always easy work, and sometimes we need a little help, but once fear is back in its rightful place, the sky—or the tallest, steepest mountain—is the limit!
#wellness #overcoming fear #SelfDiscovery
